12 Feet Down

 Assalammu Alaikum dearest beloved, I'm now mostly settled into my new place, though there are a few small things I want, and one major thing I want (hint: you). InshAllah you are doing well. I'm so happy to see you posting music again. You're so talented and gifted. The internet, and the world, is a better place with your voice in it. I hope seeing my name liking your videos does not cause you too much distress. If you do have seen it, thank you for not blocking me. I wish I could share your videos with my students. Seeing a strong Muslim woman like yourself being unafraid to express herself would inspire them. I still tell people I'm married.  Irony: I cannot stop seeing how much better it would've been if we had come here instead of Vietnam. I'm sorry I didn't try harder to find a more suitable place for us to go. For one, there is a community of like-minded people; none of the social events have alcohol and there are so many kind Muslims here. It would h...

Waiting for 4th and final plane ride now. I’m sorry again for everything bb. I love you forever and always. Trying not to cry in the terminal, but it’s hard to be happy without knowing I’ll see you again. Even harder because I don’t know how much pain you’re carrying or how or if I can help. I brought my prayer mat and that verse or surah my brother got us. It takes up a lot of luggage space, but I’m trying anything to keep favorite with Allah and continue trying to be a better Muslim. I bought a nice Quran to take with me too. And of course, the ring, which I’ll wear regardless. I want to be better, and I want to always try. I pray it’s true, and Allah lets you see it. Please be happy, please be okay. I want to talk to you so badly. I don’t wanna make a misstep and reach out if it bothers you, fingers crossed February, inshaAllah. Love, yours

আস্সালামু আলাইকুম I'm scrambling around Ohare as of the time this becomes published, where I’ll be for the next 7 hours.  I hope and pray Allah is filling your heart with peace, joy, and love. Starting 2025 with a message from you filled my heart with immense joy and purpose. " Knowing the mouse might one day leave its hole and get the cheese... " I don't know if it is appropriate to message you further... I long for the days when we'd send "wyd? messages. I love reading, and I miss talking to you and hearing your perspective. I love the way you see the world, and I'm beginning to feel like I say things worth hearing and sharing as well. Without your voice it often feels as if music were silenced. Without directly knowing you're happy, my faith turns to the only direction to which faith can be measured.  I am under the impression I should not message you before February (and I'm not even sure it's still on the table. No matter what, I can hope...